When I was in college, I worked at an exotic dance bar and one the things we girls loved to do was lap dance. Lap dancing is an exquisite sensual activity which can be as intimate as needed and yet not imply actual sex. Any exotic dancer will tell you that girls are encouraged to tease and flirt as long as the customer orders drinks. When his needs become more urgent, we are told to withdraw, let things cool off and then get back on again.